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TB 30: How To Let Go Of People Without Hurting Them

July 29, 2019 By Scott Gilbert Leave a Comment

Relationships can be hard enough, but what about ending a relationship? How can you let it go without hurting the other person? In this episode we discuss what is really going on and how to move on in a way that is best for both of you. Press the play icon above.

If you found this episode helpful, may I ask if you can help out by sharing it? It would mean the world to me. Thank you. If you are still struggling with this, leave me a comment below and let’s get your questions answered.

How To Let Go Of People Without Hurting Them

Show Notes

Here is an outline of what you can expect from this podcast episode. Listen to the podcast if you can, as I go into more detail which will help you.

How To Let Go Of People Without Hurting Them

  • Today we have a question from a listener. She actually sent in 4 questions, and I asked her to choose one because they are different topics. I asked her to choose the topic that matters most to her right now.
  • Her question is about ending a relationship, and how to let go of someone without hurting them.
  • This is an important topic because we all go through this at some point, and we handle it has a powerful effect on actually ending the relationship and on the next one we attract.
  • I am going to read her letter and then address it part by part.
  • I have modified it slightly for clarity, the meaning has not been changed.
  • Here we go…

Hi Scott,

Thank you so much for responding.

You are so very clear with conveying your ideas, and they very much resonate with me.

I think the topic of bringing in more money would be the most fun. I am doing pretty well with the others except for the last topic. Ugh. Maybe that’s the one we should talk about. I’m in a 4 year relationship. I’m no longer attracted to him. He’s now retired. Not exercising. Not productive in my opinion.

I’m 7 years younger [and] very active. I work very hard to maintain my home and property. He’s now living with me until he finds a house.  He is not currently actively looking!  Not paying me any money but [he’s] trying to help around house – but not very much.  He has plenty of money and spends at least an hour a day looking at his investment portfolio.

Any insight would be appreciated. In the meantime I will listen again to your podcasts.  It’s helpful to me to reinforce these ideas.

Thank you!
-J

  • As you are listening, you may already have feelings about this
  • Some of you may feel frustration for her, and others may relate to this same situation
  • This is not a healthy situation as it stands
  • I’m going to tell you why, and what can be done about it
  • Let’s go through this piece by piece

Hi Scott,

Thank you so much for responding.

You are so very clear with conveying your ideas, and they very much resonate with me. 

  • Thank you… you are why I am doing this!

I think the topic of bringing in more money would be the most fun. I am doing pretty well with the others except for the last topic.  Ugh.  Maybe that’s the one we should talk about. 

  • Since you haven’t seen all of her questions, I’ll state that her last topic is “How to let go of people without hurting them (outgrowing a relationship)”

I’m in a 4 year relationship. I’m no longer attracted to him. He’s now retired. Not exercising. Not productive in my opinion. 

  • What are you feeling? I am sensing disappointment, even some frustration.
  • You are attracting more of what you are feeling, which is an indication of your point of attraction.

I’m 7 years younger [and] very active. I work very hard to maintain my home and property. He’s now living with me until he finds a house.  He is not currently actively looking!  Not paying me any money but [he’s] trying to help around house – but not very much.  He has plenty of money and spends at least an hour a day looking at his investment portfolio. 

  • The law of attraction brings the essence of what you radiate… what you vibrate.
  • When you decide you want something, and you believe it, you will begin to see evidence of manifestation quickly.
  • Why am I telling you this?
    • Because your ex has not made a decision to find a house – if he did, that house will come to him – and you will see and feel the results in motion.
    • I am also telling you this because you have not made the decision to move on. If you did, he would not be in your house. You may argue that point and tell me that you did make the decision to move on, but I am telling you that you are still in the pondering mode. When a decision is made, the law of attraction will bring you the results.
  • Making a true decision can be the hardest part of manifesting deliberately.
  • You are allowing him, you are enabling him.
  • You are both suffering as a result (yes, him too). 

Any insight would be appreciated. In the meantime I will listen again to your podcasts.  It’s helpful to me to reinforce these ideas.

Thank you! 

  • Now here’s the kicker… if you do not end this properly, your vibration will bring to you another relationship just like this one. How many people do you know who complained about their relationship for years, and when they finally break up, they’re complaining about the new relationship too. Different faces, different places, same vibration, same problems. Make sense?
  • You have to change your vibration to change the next relationship the law of attraction brings to you.
  • You have to find a way to take charge, get happy in your own confidence, and watch the changes take place.
  • When you remain in an unhappy relationship with another person, you are only delaying happiness for the both of you.
  • And yes, even though you are “broken up”, you are still in this relationship whether you realize it or not.

Your Question

  • So to answer your question “how to let go of another person without hurting them” is to focus on your own well-being.
  • It is important to understand that you are hurting them more by delaying the inevitable, and by doing so, you are hurting yourself.
  • Take care of yourself, get into alignment, and the law of attraction will bring you your desires.
  • It is not your responsibility to take care of him, he’s got his own vibration going on.
  • When you are powerfully focused on your desire, the law of attraction will remove him from your experience because you will no longer be vibrating on the same frequency as he is.

Questions, Comments?

  • Thank you, thank you, thank you for your questions!
  • Please keep those questions coming!
  • If you have questions or comments, you can post them below or you can contact me using the contact form here
  • I appreciate that you are listening!
  • If you found this episode helpful, may I ask if you can help out by sharing it? It would mean the world to me. Thank you.
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Filed Under: Love and Relationships, Podcast Tagged With: Law of Attraction, Relationships

TB 29: Law of Attraction – My Partner Does Not Believe In It

June 19, 2019 By Scott Gilbert Leave a Comment

The law of attraction always brings you that which is in harmony with your vibration, even when you are not aware of it. A listener asks how the law of attraction affects a relationship when one partner does not believe in it. This episode digs into this common circumstance, explores the truths, and reveals ways you can manage and control your outcome.

 

Show Notes

Here is an outline of what you can expect from this podcast episode. Listen to the podcast if you can, as I go into more detail which will help you.

Law of Attraction: My Partner Does Not Believe In It

  • As we learn about the law of attraction, and learn to apply it, we begin to harness great power that was always there waiting for us
  • But what happens if you are in a relationship where your partner does not believe in it?
  • Does it matter? If so, how should it be handled?
  • I received a letter from Oksana, a listener who has been learning to apply the law of attraction in her life. Her partner does not believe in it, and she wants to know what to do about. It.
  • In the live podcast, I read the letter (below) and go into detail regarding each paragraph, thought, comment, and question.
  • Please note that the letter below has been slightly edited for clarity only… no meanings or intentions have been altered.
  • Let’s do it…

Question on law of attraction and have a partner that doesn’t believe in it

Hi Scott,

Your podcasts have been a tremendous help in clarifying (the) law of attraction in such a unique and simple way! I have had a lot of “aahhhaa” moments just listening to your podcast.

I just started to get into law of attraction and I am up and down on this. One day I will be so positive and the next I am down again. I don’t know if it has to do with my partner not believing in it or not. I want to be stronger in (the) law of attraction and pursue it to the fullest so I can change my life and get what I want, but my partner whom I see and interact with everyday, is not so positive and optimistic as I am.

I can feel how this changes my mood and brings me back down to “square one” and I have to start over. For example: I really want a home (we are in apartments now) and I keep speaking out loud how amazing it will be when we get our home next year (I am believing in that with all my heart) and he shuts down my optimism with “realism” knowing it would be a hard thing to accomplish in his eyes.

My question to you is: Will I be able to manifest my desires having a partner that is influential in a negative way in my life daily? Does he have to believe as well in my dreams since we are “one” and we would be getting the home “together”? Or would I need to separate from him and focus on my own desires. I would LOVE for him to be with me in my journey of a better life.

Thank you for all your help. You can use my name in the podcast, I don’t mind.

  • It’s much better to listen to the podcast, but I will try to sum it up here anyway. (you can listen to the podcast by pressing the play button above)
  • Summary points…
    • Ups and downs are normal for learning to apply the law of attraction (just like anything else). Repetition is the key for being able to gain deliberate control of your results. After all, you cannot expect to be a great musician without repetitive practice either. This applies to everything, so keep going and don’t get discouraged.
    • The above part has nothing to do with your partner, however his influence can affect your outcome. His vibration is not in harmony with yours (on the subject), and it is your choice to allow that influence. I know that statement may be hard to accept.
    • It is best not to have these conversations with him. Your results will speak for itself.
    • You can always manifest your desires, regardless of your partners point of view. However, it requires that you stay in alignment with yourself and that you avoid (or block out) his negative vibrations of influence.
    • He does not have to believe as well… he creates his own life. Ideally, your positive energy will influence him into a better place whereby he will seek to learn as well.
    • You can manifest anything you want. However, you cannot control the thoughts and manifestations of another, and therefore manifesting what you want out of other people is not possible (but can be influenced). The law of attraction will instead bring you another person that is in alignment. I get that may not be what you want to hear, but the result will be amazing.
    • I am all for relationships working, so I am not suggesting that you part ways. I suggest that you get into alignment, and let the universe handle the details. You will either be brought together or drawn apart based on your respective vibrations.
    • As long as you are in alignment, the end result will be good (remember, you attract what you think about / vibrate, whether you want it or not).
  • Listen to the podcast for a better understanding.

Questions, Comments?

  • Please subscribe to my podcast, and please keep those questions coming!
  • If you have questions or comments, you can post them below or you can contact me using this contact form
  • And if you find any value in my podcast, please use the share buttons below to share it.
  • I appreciate that you are listening!
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Filed Under: Love and Relationships, Podcast Tagged With: Law of Attraction, Relationships

TB 28: My Relationship Is Complicated And I Don’t Know What To Do

May 25, 2019 By Scott Gilbert Leave a Comment

Are you in a complicated relationship? Do feel stuck? Are you aware of your desires, but can’t seem to make them come true? If any of this rings true for you, you are going to want to listen to this episode where I discuss what’s at the core and what to do about it.

 

Show Notes

Here is an outline of what you can expect from this podcast episode. Listen to the podcast if you can, as I go into more detail which will help you.

My Relationship Is Complicated And I Don’t Know What To Do

  • Another great question from a listener
  • She is asking how to fix a relationship, but after reading her letter I realize that it goes much deeper and is more complicated
  • I always appreciate your questions, and so many ask about relationships
  • Every question is surrounded by a different circumstance, so please keep those relationship questions coming in (as well as for any other subject)
  • In the podcast, I read the letter (below) and go into detail regarding each paragraph, thought, comment, and question
  • Note that the letter below has been slightly edited for clarity only… no meanings or intentions have been altered
  • Let’s get into it…

How do I fix my relationship?

Hi Scott!

I am from the Philippines and I love listening to your podcast. I have been doing the law of attraction for so long on and off. On and off because sometimes I stop being aware of my feelings and I only start to realize it when things go against what I want, and then I start to control it back again.

Please, be patient with my message as English is not my first language J. Anyway, it has been easy for me to manifest money and career opportunities, with that, it’s so easy for me to generate the frequency I wanted in that part of my life.

However, when it comes to relationships, It has become a little bit of a struggle since it involves emotions connected to the person I am dealing with.

For example: my current relationship is with a guy who is very pessimistic and completely different from me. We have a child together so I consider him as my family or husband. But he himself doesn’t show that way to me. We stay in separate rooms, which is not my choice. And when he doesn’t want to be around me, he locks himself in his room. And when he feels like going out, he would (go out) without even telling me where he is going, or (even) if he is going out… I will just see his room empty. He is not supportive to my career, and doesn’t show interest with what I do with my life.

Before listening to your podcast we decided to be separated, but because of my desire to have a happy and complete family, I started recalling all the happy memories we had, (and) after a few days we decided to get back together and try again.

I told myself that I will only focus on the positive things in our relationship. But somehow whenever he does things that I don’t like, it gets hard for me to control my thoughts and emotions towards him. I get disappointed, and I start to question myself if I should really be here.

I know that I love him, and I really want a happy family and actual partner in life, who is supportive, sweet, kind and loves my company. I just hope he can be like that.

Is that possible if I focus on the positive? But how do I stop myself from being disappointed when he does things that I don’t like? And what train of thoughts should I think about when I start to feel self pity toward his treatment towards me?

I know I can’t change the person, but in this case it’s the treatment of the person toward me that I want to change. Please help me figure out what actions I should take for my desire to happen.

I trust that you will read my message and help me out.

More power to you as you have helped so many.

  • Thank you for you letter
  • Listen to the podcast by pressing the play button above

Questions, Comments?

  • If you have questions or comments, you can post them below or you can contact me using the contact form here
  • Please keep those questions coming!
  • And if you find any value in my podcast, please use the share buttons below to share it
  • I appreciate you!
  • Thank you for listening!
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Filed Under: Love and Relationships, Podcast Tagged With: Manifesting, Relationships

TB 26: Are We Both Manifesting Each Other?

May 13, 2019 By Scott Gilbert Leave a Comment

We manifest everyone who enters our experience, and they manifest us just the same. Then why haven’t I manifested my perfect mate? In this episode, I go into the process of how people manifest each other and why your results don’t match your desires.

 

Show Notes

Here is an outline of what you can expect from this podcast episode. Listen to the podcast if you can, as I go into more detail which will help you.

How Can I Remain Happy And Grateful So I Can Manifest?

  • Before I get into today’s episode, I want to thank all of you who listen to my podcast.
  • Today marks a milestone… it’s one year since I launched the ThinkBlissful.com blog (the podcast was launched a month later).
  • I received an email from a guy who has questions regarding manifesting a relationship, and refers to a former podcast episode (#TB 22) where I answered a question.
  • I recorded today’s episode without first making notes. I feel more comfortable that way because it’s more natural. As such, I do not have detailed notes here today. I provided the letter below.
  • Listen to the podcast to hear what I have to say. If you prefer that I make detailed show notes, please let me know in the comments below.
  • Here’s the letter I received…

Subject: Hi!!! Law of Attraction

Hi!! This article really resonated with me and I’m so happy it was written just two months ago. When you state this: “The short answer is, you already manifested him, that is why he entered your experience.”, what do you mean?

If we manifested someone we haven’t even met, nor have talked to, but notice them, and are actively trying to manifest them, then why cant we manifest them to notice us and manifest a relationship with them?

I hope I’m making sense!

Also, I was watching a video on YouTube about manifesting a specific person, and how its normal and natural and something we do daily. I was reading one of the comments, it stated that, “Remember, when we are manifesting a specific person, they are also manifesting us, either unconsciously or consciously.”

So, based off of your comment, is this also what you are saying? Where did you learn that piece of information? 🙂

Sorry for the long winded comment. I noticed a woman come into my experience and noticed things about her that has made me become very interested in knowing her. But she, I don’t think has noticed me. She sees me, but we have never talked. I don’t even know her name at all. I see her in passing.

 

Questions, Comments?

  • Please keep your questions coming!
  • Contact me at ThinkBlissful.com/contact
  • Please share this blog and podcast with your friends and followers
  • Thank you for listening! I appreciate you!
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Filed Under: Love and Relationships, Podcast Tagged With: Law of Attraction, Relationships

TB 24: I’m Frustrated… Why Isn’t It Working?

April 5, 2019 By Scott Gilbert Leave a Comment

Are you frustrated because you cannot seem to get the law of attraction to work for you? The law of attraction is always working, never falters, and manifestations always match your dominant thoughts. I will clarify why it seems to elude you, and what you can do about it. Press the play icon above to listen.

Did you find this episode helpful? Can I ask that you help out by sharing it? It would mean the world to me. Thank you. If you are still struggling with this, leave me a comment below and let’s get your questions answered.

Why isn't the law of attracting working?

Show Notes

Here is an outline of what you can expect from this podcast episode. Listen to the podcast if you can, as I go into more detail which will help you.

I’m Frustrated… Why Isn’t This Working?

  • Today’s episode is about clarification, and it was inspired by a listener
  • Several weeks ago, a listener sent me a message to thank me for this podcast
  • She let me know that, although she always practiced the law of attraction, my podcasts helped her learn how to understand it and apply it better
  • In an ensuing dialogue, she let me know that the law of attraction has been attracting wonderful results in the areas of health, wealth, and career success… she also let me know that she is ready to meet her soul mate but needs to learn how to apply the law of attraction to relationships
  • As I read her message, I can identify where her vibration is not congruent with her desire… I’ll review that in just a moment
  • Before I go into this, I want to point out that the title of this episode begins with “I’m frustrated”… the listener that inspired this episode did not mention whether or not she is frustrated, nor did she ask why it isn’t working
  • The reason I titled this episode the way I did, is because the subject matter that we are about to review will directly help people who are frustrated as they try to apply the law of attraction without achieving the results they so desire
  • Getting back to the listener, I’d like to share the message that I received from her earlier this week:

Hi again Scott- I wanted to get some advice from you… I have become aware that my problem is lack and belief specifically for my “husband”. I don’t have this issue of lack and belief in other areas.

I know how to solve lack (I think) and that is to be happy with myself and not dwell on the fact that I don’t have it. I know I have to [be] happy with or without it- do you suggest anything else when it comes to using the law of attraction to attract my husband? And what is it I can do more of to really believe it?

(I am using my vision board as a tool, I end the night and begin the day with what I am grateful for, and I try to daydream and imagine my husband). Maybe I am not doing it enough?

Let me know what you think.

  • Let’s take a closer look at what she is saying in her letter, and I’ll address each part directly to her.

I have become aware that my problem is lack and belief specifically for my “husband”. I don’t have this issue of lack and belief in other areas.

  • You are aware that your vibration is one of lack and you are aware that it is most likely caused by your beliefs on the subject. You is on the right track! Specifically, you are aware, and you are working on it.

I know how to solve lack (I think) and that is to be happy with myself and not dwell on the fact that I don’t have it. I know I have to happy with or without it

  • We don’t solve lack, as your attention to it brings it to you. Furthermore, “not dwelling” is also putting attention on that which you do not desire… we cannot “not dwell” (or exclude) anything in our inclusion based universe… your attention to anything brings it to you, whether you want it or not.

Do you suggest anything else when it comes to using the law of attraction to attract my husband? And what is it I can do more of to really believe it?

  • It’s good that you recognize you are not quite believing it, and you are seeking ways to move towards that belief.
  • Believing it is more about believing in the fairy tale.
  • Try saying “wouldn’t it be nice if_________”.
  • You will find yourself feeling better, and indication that you have stopped resisting and started attracting your desire.

I am using my vision board as a tool, I end the night and begin the day with what I am grateful for, and I try to daydream and imagine my husband

  • Let’s dig in here a little too… vision boards are a tool, so make sure you are using it correctly. If not, you are better off not using it at all (or at least for the time being). Vision boards are to be used to help you get into vibrational alignment… if, however, when you look at your board you become aware of what you do not have, then your board is not helping because it is holding you in a pattern of resistance. You will always know if it is helping or hindering by your emotions. If you feel lonely, impatient, or discouraged (or any other negative emotion), then your vision board is not helping because your attention when you look at your vision board is bringing you to a place of lack. But if you feel excited, hopeful, or optimistic (or any other positive emotion), then your vision board is helping you attract your desire.
  • It is a great habit to end your night and begin your day with thoughts of gratitude. Just be sure that you are feeling positive emotions to be sure your focus is on things you truly are grateful for.
  • Daydreaming and imagination are also awesome tools for creation and manifestation. Just be aware that there are times where too much detail can hinder your creating. To be clear, generally, the more vivid the detail, the better… as long as it does not induce negative thoughts. It is possible to get so detailed that it may challenge your belief system. Pay attention to your emotions.
  • The principles of the law of attraction are simple, yet applying them are not always easy… there is a difference between simple and easy
    • For example, if someone wanted to lose weight, the formula is simple: eat proper portions, do not eat too late, and exercise daily. Simple yes, but not easy.
    • The law of attraction is simple too: whatever you think about and believe will manifest into your experience
  • The work that we do, and the subject of most of my podcast episodes are about how to become aware of our thoughts, how to direct our thoughts, and how to develop belief
  • These things can all be accomplished, and once you do, you can and will be, do, or have anything you desire
  • Some things are easier for us to believe, based on our experiences in life
  • Some things are easier to focus on
  • This listener has given us an example of both
  • For instance, she set out on a path to create her desired level of health and wealth. She made a decision, and she was not bogged down by negative beliefs in these areas, rendering them easier… and she would have known that by her emotions. I gather she was feeling hopeful, or some other positive emotion (whether stronger or weaker) as she tackled her objectives. Her belief was there.
  • The difference between want and need
  • In a previous email, she stated:

“I have proven to myself that it [the law of attraction] works, but I need to learn how to now apply it to relationships”

  • Her choice of words was not an arbitrary accident…
  • And by the way, there is no difference in how the law of attraction is applied to relationships vs. anything else… it’s 100% consistent, and works the same way for everything
  • Her vibration on the subject of relationships is one of lack, and the law of attraction is bringing her more of what she is vibrating – lack
  • There is a huge difference between a “want” and a “need”
  • Let me give you an example of how important this is
  • This can apply to anything…
  • Let’s hypothetically look at two people who set out to learn to play guitar
  • Person 1 decides to learn to play guitar and can see himself on stage entertaining people
  • Person 2 decides to learn to play guitar because it’s “cool” to be a guitar player
  • Person 1 wants to play guitar, where person 2 needs to play… please don’t pick apart my choice of example here, you may be thinking that person 2 doesn’t need to play, but when you look deeper, the need to play may actually be the need for validation or acceptance… there’s no real desire to play guitar
  • Can you see the difference between the vibrations (the point of attraction) of these two people?
  • Person 1 wants to read guitar magazines, go to music stores, and practice playing
  • Person 2 has no desire for any of these things, not eve even to practice… it’s more of a chore
  • The difference is the excitement in the journey
  • An unhappy journey cannot lead to a happy end… you must enjoy the process
  • Person 1 wants to learn guitar and can already see himself as an entertainer
  • Person 2 wants only to be recognized as a guitar player
  • Can you imagine if Pablo Picasso did not want to paint, but only wanted to recognized as a painter?
  • People who are successful in their field have a driving passion
  • They love what they are doing… sure, they also enjoy the fruits of their passion
  • When your desire comes from within, everything begins to fall into place easily and begins to manifest quickly
  • If you are not feeling the passion, you’ll need to work on your belief (yes, there are things you can do to get there)
  • If you want to be rich, but you have no desire to go through the process of building a career or business, you are just not likely to get there
  • If you want to be healthy, but you have no desire to take those actions, then you are not likely to get there
  • If you want to be in a happy relationship, but you have no desire to happy first, then you are not likely to get there
  • To help your belief and desire grow, think about the pleasures and joys of living your dream… work on that vibration
  • When you begin to believe it, then you will become inspired… you will really begin to enjoy the thought of becoming!
  • If you have been wanting to be a great cook, by focusing your thoughts on what that feels like, and getting into alignment, you will soon be inspired to learn to cook and take course, and actually enjoy the process (the journey)

 

Questions, Comments?

  • Please keep your questions coming!
  • Contact me at ThinkBlissful.com/contact
  • Also, please share this blog and podcast with your friends and followers
  • Thank you for listening! I appreciate you!

 

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Filed Under: Law of Attraction, Love and Relationships, Podcast Tagged With: Law of Attraction, Relationships

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